August

The honeymoon July has passed in a blink of an eye. At the end of July, i had a cold war with someone. Well, I did not want to narrate about it. Life is short and time is fleeting. I will learn to forgive and let him him goes. It is always easier to say than done. One of my friend said that restrained relationship ain't fun. Yes, absolutely right. I was on the verge of breaking down. Yet, with the blessing of God and the support from my friend, I was able to get through it. I will keep on moving and I hope that I can be more productive during August.

I can foretell that August will be a hectic month. The assignments are keep coming out. Today, I received my BM assignment. shit question The assignment wants us to find a poem and then hurai keselarasan vokal. That is fine. But then we need to use few words from poem and create a short story!!!! Cerpen!! The syllabus does not have cerpen but we need to do it. shit! shit! shit! I was quite enraged because my Bm vocabulary is limited. I have not completed a BM essay since I gratuated from secondary school. Now you want me to write a short story?? I was damn scared. My Bm is the worst in whole class. WHY? Out of 26 students, 24 are malays and bumi. 2 chinese. And the other chinese girl, her BM is splendid. She has mixed with Malays since secondary school. She speaks like Malay.

Sigh.. This assignment is needed to be hand in on 1 september. My school holidays end on 31 August. I come back to maktab damn institute on 31. That means I need to almost complete the assignment before holidays. Who will do assignments during holidays? At least I'm not the one. I need to accompany my precious family who longs for my companion and savour the mouth-watering food in Kch ok??

Finally, I will work hard for this month. Idleness please switch off and facebook please stop distract me ok?

I wanna go home..

a nice one..

Lady Antebellum feat Jim Brickman (NEVER ALONE)

May the angels protect you
Trouble neglect you
And heaven accept you when it's time to go home
May you always have plenty
The glass never empty
Know in your belly
You're never alone

May your tears come from laughing
You find friends worth having
With every year passing
They mean more than gold
May you win and stay humble
Smile more than grumble
And know when you stumble
You're never alone

Never alone
Never alone
I'll be in every beat of your heart
When you face the unknown
Wherever you fly
This isn't goodbye
My love will follow you stay with you
Baby you're never alone

Well, I have to be honest
As much as I wanted
I'm not gonna promise that cold winds won't blow
So when hard times have found you
And your fear surrounds you
Wrap my love around you
You're never alone

Never alone
Never alone
I'll be in every beat of your heart
When you face the unknown
Wherever you fly
This isn't goodbye
My love will follow you stay with you
Baby you're never alone

May the angels protect you
Trouble neglect you
And heaven accept you when it's time to go home
And when hard times have found you
And your fear surrounds you
Wrap my love around you
You're never alone

Never alone
Never alone
I'll be in every beat of your heart
When you face the unknown
Wherever you fly
This isn't goodbye
My love will follow you stay with you
Baby you're never alone

My love will follow you stay with you
Baby you're never alone

There is something...

There is something that I need to blog about, since it has been such a long time I don't update my blog. Sometimes when i have the mood to blog, the celcom broadband or the school wireless is not working well. Well, what can I say. This is what we call "life".. We can't always get what we want.

Firstly, I got number ONE for semester 2!!! UP UP! Actually I had a hard life during semester 2 and seldom studied. But I did put an effort in assignments. Most of the time, group work become individual work. Anyway this is totally out of my expectation. The GPA for semester 2 is 3.74, compared to semester one which is only 3.47. This can prove that maktab students depend on assignments' marks to survive. Sigh. I know this result happens once in a blue moon. I will cherish it. The semester 3 I will have to take MUET. I think I will concentrate in improving my English if can. Coz you cant retake the test right? Sure want to achieve as higher band as I can. Band 4 and above.

Secondly, I met many lecturers who like to fuss over trivial things for this semester. I am pretty detest these kind of situation. I am always thinking of "why they just cant make our lives easier?" Arrrgghh.. A pile of useless works are needed to be done.

Lastly, this semester can be either challenging ( MUET) or mundane (repetition of life). Just wanna to end this semester faster. I am bored with the foundation course. This does not mean that I anticipate the degree course. I think the situation wont get better since Science and Mathematics are now teaching in Malay. No comment. Any comment would be vain. I just think that the education system is disoriented. "They" are ambivalent and dilemma most of the time. Teachers and students are akin dolls. They can change the policy easily and we just follow blindly.

Now is 3.40am. Luckily tomorrow no class. But I will surely woke up by the chit chatting and laughing of a bunch of girls. Time to log out. Night.

kick me hard

I'm just like a ball being kicked here and there. People talk to you because you are useful to them. And, they feel stupid to bother you when they feel that it is none of their business. Well, I should have take my friend's advice； you dont need to become a good people, you just need to become a Human. I think she is right, always. I'm too tired to be kind for sometimes. I feel weary of thinking and caring of others.. These are all follies.

Surrounded by millions people by, I feel alone.

Ok, i am ignorant because I languish love and company in this kind of world.
This kind of life... Suck!!!!

distance

the distance between us is enormous, just like the universe. I should fathom the truth.

Dd's cakes

Let the pictures tell the story. I am lazy to write.. Anyway, I am proud to have such a brother.

Haiz.. I am not adroit in time management. When the holidays just started, I promised myself that I will do something significant, such as reading and a little bit studying. And now, this is the last week of holidays. I can only manage to finish 2 novels. I have not even touch Differentiation and Integration.

The main purpose of reading is to ameliorate my poor English standard. Next semester I will have to face MUET. I hope that I can get at least band 4 la in order to maintain the dignity of Chinese.. lol.. seem like so serious..

Everyday I hit the sack for almost 10 hours. I think this is a waste of time but I just cant help.. I feel a spasm of guilty. Whatever.. I know that it is no use to cry over the spilt milk. I just want to rant my feeling!!
It is surreal for me that the holidays passed just like that and the school is going to reopen imminently.

Thinking of these make me have goose-bumps-running-down-my-spine. Shudder.

Ambivalence

Ok, my feeling is ambivalent. Just know that next semester I stay with same roommates.. I am happy that I still stay with the 3 nice malay girls.. Not the people with obnoxious behaviour!!! But, I am not satisfied that I am going to stay at C2B again.. the same room! oh shit! hate it.. It is 3rd floor (the highest floor) and the hottest place.. the place which is "near" the sun. I dont care my description true or false.. I only know that the next semester is a HOT sem!

And I gonna move my extremely heavy big bags from the store to 3rd floor.. Who will understand my woes?

message

Maybe I am too greedy.. But I am hoping that the happiness can stay with me a little bit longer.

A message to my love: Dont succumb to sadness. Fight for the future as long as we are still alive. OK? Promise me.

everything passes in a wink of an eye

Time and tide wait for no man.. The first week of holidays has just passed. I just ate, slept, facebook-ed, and went to shopping.. ^^ a big contrast with the hectic life of maktab..

Yesterday I went to Boulevard with my mum and dad.. My mum and I "separated" with dad because women and men worlds are totally different.. So I accompanied my mum. Boulevard had big sales so it was not surprised that the shopping mall was crowded with people.

It was an exuberant outing. Maybe it was because I dint shopping with my mum for such a long time..

I am thinking that studying outside is a process of growing up. I cant always stay at home and being pampered by parents. Who doesnt want an easy and peaceful life? If u dont wan, I want wo.. HAHAHa. So, I have to sacrifice some important things in order to become more mature. Anyway, I still wanna say that I love my family and my old friends. The memories when we were together will imprint in my mind forever.

Erm, I am ambivalent sometimes. Hoping can stay with family some more, yet I also hope can study oversea to widen my horizon.. Yes... Studying oversea.. A dream that cant come true..

Never mind la.. I should concentrate on teacher's course first. I hope can find out the significance of my life through becoming a teacher.

O_o

woah... today i bumped into Dr Fong at one of the small restaurant in Kch.. i was not sure he still recognized me or not.. but i was a nerd when I studied in Chung Hua.. so if he did not remember me also never mind.. But I think he knew that I was from Chung Hua because I called him Dr Fong.. I told him I am studying in Maktab Gaya. hoho 逊掉了！！ i just had a short conversation with him. I never think that I will meet him again. So bumping into Dr fong was the astonishment of today..

super junior- it's you

It’s you
It’s you
It’s you
It’s only you
It’s you
It’s you

I don’t need anyone else, it’s only you
When you ask again, it’s only you
Even if you already have another love
I can’t forget you, I can’t turn back around
Oh ~
The moment my eyes began to burn
The moment my heart was captured by you
I have no regret, I chose you
That’s right, it’s you

Chorus :
Oh whatever anyone anyone says, it doesn’t matter to me
Oh whoever whoever curses me, I’ll only look at you
Even when I’m born again, it’s still only you
(Still Still) Even as time goes by

Oh when you tell me you love me
When you tell me thousands and millions of times
Even when my heart sets on fire, my dry lips wear out
Even when I’m born again, it’s still only you
(Still Still) Even as time goes by

Oh oh only for you Oh oh only for you
Oh oh only for you Oh oh only for you
Oh oh only for you Oh oh only for you
Oh oh only for you

It’s you
I don’t need any words. it’s just you
“ It’s too late “ , but for me it’s just you
I know our love is wrong
I can’t give up, I can’t let you go
Ah Ah

My lips, cold as can be, are even more blue
I cry out to find to find your warmth
I call, even though I call for you
And there’s no reply, I’ll wait for you

Chorus :
Oh whatever anyone anyone says, it doesn’t matter to me
Oh whoever whoever curses me, I’ll only look at you
Even when I’m born again, it’s still only you
(Still Still) Even as time goes by

Oh when you tell me you love me
When you tell me thousands and millions of times
Even when my heart sets on fire, my dry lips wear out
Even when I’m born again, it’s still only you
(Still Still) Even as time goes by

Oh oh only for you Oh oh only for you
Oh oh only for you Oh oh only for you
Oh oh only for you Oh oh only for you
Oh oh only for you
For me, it’s you, it’s you
Why don’t you know, why don’t you know?
For me, it’s you, it’s you

Oh whatever anyone anyone says, it doesn’t matter to me
Oh whoever whoever curses me, I’ll only look at you
Even when I’m born again, it’s still only you
(Still Still) Even as time goes by

Oh when you tell me you love me
When you tell me thousands and millions of times
Even when my heart sets on fire, my dry lips wear out
Even when I’m born again, it’s still only you
(Still Still) Even as time goes by

It’s you

holidays

i'm home..!!! HOHO.. 3 weeks holidays.. ENJOY!!

tips are flowing

Recently i received many BM tips which should made me felt happy. Last year I dint receive any tips. But my friend said de tip detail dao................ //question leaked// if i got tips, my average will be 3.5 above liao la. Bang my head. This year the tips are ok ok. Many, yet confusing..

the funny part is the first message mentioned that the Gurindam and seloka will be out in exam.

Then the next message is : BEZA DARI DAHULU HINGGA SEKARANG GURINDAM & SELOKA.

Oh. My. Gosh. If this kind of question out, how am i going to write. Ada pengaruh sastera dalam islam lagi tu.

Yello boss, I am chinese ok.. Even Malays have the difficulties in answering.

Anyway, God bless. >.<

Picture of JJ's day

the impending exams make me feel like............ wan to go home!! hahahaha.. so maybe there will be lesser posts recently.. it doesnt mean i am studying hard. I am still lazy.. The best reason for idleness is " I'm not lazy. I just get some rest before I'm tired." Cool huh..

This semester is really hard for me. The condition of my room is totally BAD. I believe no people can concentrate to study if the fan of your room is ROSAK!!!! Last time lampu rosak, then suis rosak, now kipas rosak. And also no handsome lecturer to motivate me O_o (Justzzz kidding) Tak menahan~~~ So cant blame me right??? XD

I hope this semester can over soon.. I anticipate the semester 3. Anyway, I am glad that time is ticking away.. Tick-toc, tick toc, tick- toc.....

control one's feeling

I think..

Eating alone,

Shopping alone,

Walking alone,

Loving you alone,

All of these are normal.

I dont care how the others think.

I just want to constrain myself from entering the world

that is Restricted.

So, Just leave me alone.

I dont wan the feeling of deja vu,

the feeling of being hurt and abandoned.

I'm foolish

I’m really, very foolish
I know of no one other than you

you’re looking at someone else
yet you have no idea of my feelings like this

I won’t be in your days
I won’t be in the memories either, however
only you, I looked only at you
and the tears keep coming

As i watch you walking past, I’m still happy
even yet you still don’t know my heart
I should stop this and go

I really want to see the day
I’m withstanding the pain each day
“I love you” is playing on my lips
Alone once again, crying for you
alone once again, missing for you
Baby, I love you, I’m wiating for you

I won’t be in your days
I won’t be remembered either, however
only you, I looked only at you
I’m making memories alone

Loving you is like having a beautiful wound
I look at your pretty smile also
but I cannot laugh with you

I’m thinking about you so much everyday
my heart is hurting in all these sad days
‘I want to see you’ is playing on my lips
alone once again, crying for you
alone once again, missing for you
Baby, i’m waiting for you, I love you

bye bye, never say goodbye
even though I cannot hold you like this
I need you, I cannot say anything more, I want you
I keep on hoping too, I’ll keep hoping….

I really want to see the day
I’m withstanding the pain each day
“I love you” is playing on my lips
Alone once again, crying for you

I’m thinking about you so much everyday
my heart is hurting in all these sad days
‘I want to see you’ is playing on my lips
alone once again, crying for you
alone once again, missing for you
Baby, i’m waiting for you, I love you

纸船

一艘小纸船，悠悠地飘过来，吸收水分，渐渐沉默，世上最美好的东西都有有效期限。。

但我却不愿如脑海逝去的脸庞一样，和你成为陌路人。

不是要放弃，而是不曾抓住。终究是要闭上眼，眼睁睁地看着他随风而去。。随波逐流吧。。为何一定要坚持到最后呢？

反正，我从平凡中而来，也将从平凡中逝去。

Transient happiness

Yesterday I had my GERKO Bola Baling as usual, 4pm to 6pm. We had friendly match with TESL Group.. Two weeks before the TESL organized a small competition. There was no doubt that we needed to participate the competition. That time we were very blur and didnt even know the rules. And TESL was strong also with tall Indians and Malays plus a chinese who was a state player for basketball. So we lose and the score was 2-1. It was a brand new experience for me as I did not participate in any sport games before.

Surprisingly, we won yesterday. I played the defence position. I ran here and there to disturb the opponents. It was tiring but fun. When you concentrated on the ball, you wont think too much. Then, you can forget all the things and stress that made you frustrated.

Our team's scorer was Sakinah. She was an experienced player. I like the way she scored coz she bounced the ball so that the goalkeeper lost track with the ball. The ball was reflected into the goal.

The final score was 1-0. Luckily our goalkeeper was really damn li hai, or else the opponents wont score nothing.

The most important part of yesterday was after the game finished, I walked to the side of the field. Then I heard the boys scream "Ai Teng!" I looked at them then I saw the handsome boy from PJ option give me a thumbs up and smiled with a wide radiance. Oh. My. Gosh. He was Kelvin Poh. Many girls love him because he has cute smile and very man. I was totally surprised and shy and replied him with a thumbs up also then looked down pretending to tie up my shoes.

Sigh.. Happiness was transient. Yet I was contended.

After that, it was the boys turn to match. Our group won as usual because most of the boys were from PJ option. Their performance was superb which made me kept screaming for them. One of the boys even can laid down and shot!

This was my another nice experience in my life. Hoping that I have chosen the right path for my life. Rockssssssssssss!!!!

A nice experience

Few days ago, my friend and I were called to help lecturer to do some work. The lecturer was Mr George. I was sleeping at that time but my friend woke me up. Tho my sleeping was disturbed, i still went to help. Hmm.. just wanna did some good deed and fulfilled my evil intention.. HEHEHE..

There were piles of documents without surprise.. We arranged and stapled them. Mr George and Mr Chan were there helping us also. I am quite admired them because they can communicate well and they are cool. Mr George teaches me Kemahiran Berfikir/ Thinking Skills. You will be attracted by him when he starts talking. I wish I can talk like him someday. And Mr Chan doesnt teach me. But i judge him as a good lecturer. I dont have bias against him although i admit he is cute with dimples.. XD

Then I helped Pn Goh to burn the cd. The burning process took a long time. So I killed time by chatting with lecturers. Actually they were the one who talked to me first. Yes, how could I talk much since I was so shy one? The main point of conversation was they were shocked that i got straight As in SPM but I chose to become a teacher. They kept "bom" me and i didnt know how to reply them. Sigh. Mr Chan suggested me to choose chemical engineers. Yes, I know engineering is a "hot" study field. I have many friends choose engineering. The coolest reason that I could think now was I dont want to follow other people paces. What a bullshit reason huh..

There were many reasons for me to get into maktab.. It was quite complicated.. But are they important now? No, not at all.. There was another female lecturer on the spot while I "kena bom". She wanted me to ignore the "bad guys". She said," Show them what you got! Prove to them!" She did not agree them to frighten me. I felt touched and I will remember her words. It was too bad for me that I didnt know her name. However, I knew Mr George and Mr Chan were with good intentions also. I appreciated their kindness.. Hmm. Lecturers from Jabatan Profesiolisme are really Professional.

Then, Sir Henry came into the jabatan awhile. He was my evil intention. Ooops what did I say? Neh, just kidding. After finishing all the jobs, they brought us to eat. XD happy~~ walau.. Eating with lecturers was a nice experience. It was because both of them were hilarious and fun.

Being a teacher is not easy. Being a Good teacher is NEVER EASY. Well, I wonder what kind of teacher I will become in a future.

敬请期待。

Deteriorate

I'm deteriorating. I hate myself.

The most intricate thing

The most intricate thing to find in this world.
Is it a needle that you lost in the desert?

The most intricate thing to find in this world.
Is it a crow's feather that you lost in the darkness of the night?

The most intricate thing to find in this world is,
Realizing your own erroneous contemplation.

A slice of life

Life is rushing to make up on lost time

I have to stop and catch my breath

Move to the stands and catch a good sit

Take some time to look around

Get myself a slice of life

Just so I can stay sane

Going through my life..

What hurts the most?

What hurts the most for you now? I believe your heart will feel like being torn apart when your loves one are hurt by a monster. The saddest thing is you are unable to protect your love one. You are POWERLESS.

Once again, the monster beat my mum. I wondered why your hand did not feel pain when you hit somebody. Why are you always so childish and cannot control your emotion at all. What heinous crime has been committed by others that you totally cannot forgive them. Yae, I should know that monster only has the feeling of anger and hatred. "Monster” is the designation for belligerent human. You are akin a catastrophe to us. We have endured the torment for so many years. U knew why I insisted to study outside? It was because I wanted to be independent.. And the utmost important reason was I wanted to stay away from U. Actually I could choose Curtin to study but I didnt. Who would forcast that you transferred to Kuching work?? If like that I will stay in Miri with mother now.. Well, I know life is which unexpected events always happen. I will let bygone be bygone and look forward.

I know that in the deep of my heart, I feel a little bit fortunate because I dont need to face melancholy now. My brother is the one who always carries the burden. He has become more mature and protective. Luckily he protected my mother that day. Or else, I could not think what would happen. He must be underwent excruciating pain when the monster said," you think you can protect your mother even if you are here???" I, as the bystander, feel like there is a knife piercing through my heart when I remember his word. How bout my brother? How did he feel when he heard the word?

Anyway, thank you dd for giving unconditional love and support to mum. You are the pillar for me and mother. YOU ARE MAN!!! I love you..

I hope that the monster can exercise the forbearance in treating people tho I understand that this is an unattainable wish.

pondering

AN EMO POST. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.

I am pondering that is there any eternity relationship in this world? Eternity friendship? Eternity love? Well, actually I dont think so.. Partings and reunions are vicissitudes of life. We always need to separate with the person that we care and love. I feel that my old friends and I are akin the ships travel in the sea. Some of the ships travel to Pacific Ocean, some travels to Atlantic Ocean.. Every ship has its own journey. Different life.

All of us lead a hectic life now. We need to work and study. I admit that this kind of life has made me become forgetful. I forget the old memories.. Forget that we had been so close before. Frankly, human is forgetful. I am one of them. No matter how good I treated you before, or vice versa, all of them will be omitted.

When you said you missed me, you wanna see me.. I believed it was true. I went back to my hometown and planned to see you. At last, we dint meet each other tho we were in the same city. How sarcastic huh.. You knew that this was a once in a blue moon opportunity. Sadly, it was not treasured by anyone..

And now, I might dont have the chance to see my old friends anymore. Since I left my hometown and transferred to a city that I longed to go before but not now.. It was ironic for me, but not you. I also do not deem that human relationships can be deepened by using sms or phone call or MSN. There are too many barriers; distance, time, money and fate. We cannot know each other's life explicitly.. It is vague.. And sometimes we are lazy to type or call. Therefore, we are estranged day by day..

I know my post may not be 100% true.. But I believe some parts are correct. I will be idle to explain to my friends the reasons that I write this emo post. I do not force you to truly understand me. Perhaps strangers may understand. The thinking keeps popping out from my head so I have to write. I am just lugubrious to human relationship recently..

a guilty conscience

Monday - I ruined my roommate's iron. Luckily it still can be used. And she did not angry. Phew~ but i was culpable for my carelessness.

Tuesday - While playing bola baling, I wanna threw the ball. But the ball slipped from my hand and hit my friend's face. I apologized. I felt guilty.

Wednesday - what will happen. I don dare to think. (I foretell that the rest of the week will be auspicious for @teng) hehe...

And I never mean to hurt anyone. Really. Truly. Sincerely. Sorry

著作権を所有します。

Recently my life is mundane as usual.. There is no special event has happened tat can make people excited about it.. Maybe it is good also because it means I am safe enough. I just need to repeat the monotonous task everyday.

But, there are always something that can affect your mood. Such as, how do you feel when you see other people imitate your work? Since you have spent so many sleepless nights and so many hours to find information from everywhere and finally you success to create the work that you are satisfied with. I have done the research on that things for such a long duration. Now I can understand why the artists are frustrated when there are people steal their work and produce pirated CDs. It is absolute agony. And also, if you cant even know the basic, how can you create the work which is advanced your level? I just feel sorry that I cant tell everything right now.. It is unfortunate for you to meet an egocentric person like me.

It's Ok also as most of the work is done by me. That is fine. I will convince myself that I have learnt umpteen knowledge. Because I learned that I cant always have faith in other people. I am just a toy that is played by other mankind.

jj@teng all rights reserved

亲爱的小孩

亲爱的小孩：

曾经我也想你一样，抬头仰望一片新叶，看一朵飘过的云，就会觉得快乐。

曾经我也能静静地站在树下，听风翻舞树林，小鸟鸣唱，就会觉得感动。

昨天我在公园里学你，听鸟唱风吹，看绿叶云飘，竟觉得十分地萧索无趣。

我感到微微地震撼，心情郁闷地走进一家高级餐厅，点了昂贵的餐，还喝了红酒。后来，我态度倨傲
地抱怨鱼子酱不新鲜，指责牛排不够嫩。。。。其实我只是借故发挥，舒缓我躁郁难平的情绪。。。我一直很懊恼，我怎么会变得如此可憎呢？

我嫉妒你，痛心哀悼我逝去的。。

大话证劵 王董 四月六日

摘自《我只能为你画一张小卡片》

欣赏几米ing。。。

最近爱上了几米的作品，为何没早点注意到你的作品呢?
几米的文章是那么的真实，又是那么的虚幻。
介于那个美妙的平衡点。希望有空可以分享几米的文章。打华语字比较难，需要多点时间。哈哈。
人总是这样吧。爱幻想自己很凄凉。。我也是其中一个。喜欢冷嗖嗖的感觉。。我就分享其中一句我深深爱上的句子吧。。

冬日，天一暗，即昏沉入睡。夜里的梦又多又杂，天未亮就恍惚醒来。真伤脑筋。

摘自-我只能为你画一张卡片

Let bygone be bygone

I was so hilarious.. I thought that I would not hurt by you anymore. I was ambivalent. Anyway, I will wear a mask and walk away tho scandal wont stop. Let bygone be bygone.. Do not dig out the absurd feeling again.
End.

Maze

I was the most unfortunate.
I knew that there was no exit out of this maze.

Then, he was the next unfortunate.
He did not know that there was no exit out of this maze.

But all the rest weren't so unfortunate.
They didn't know that they were in the maze in the first place.

-Frederica Bernkastel

Perhaps

Maybe I should not possess anything

I can relinquish everything..

Possessing is good

Losing is also okay..

Hope everything will be fine

Perhaps I can surpass these..

As time is sprinting

in this shimmering city.

reiterate

Again.. I commit the sin of omission..

miles away

Yes, I saw you today.. so near yet so far.. I will endure the torment anyway.

skeptical

phew~ finally i success to log in my blog. I should treasure the opportunity to update although i dont have anything special to share. How woeful..

Now my life goes on by doing assignments blindly.. And when you knew there were some mistakes in your assignments, it was akin a knife which was piercing your heart. I know every human makes flaws. I should accept the reality with open-hearted and avoid making the same mistake notwithstanding I always do. I also detest that I cant get full mark in the exam because of careless mistakes.. careless careless careless.. what the hell.. Get out from my life!

Besides, I also skeptical of myself.. Just feel like starting to lose my target.. Or maybe it is because I am not dare to dream big. I dont want to face the trepidation. Whatever... The most important now is finishing all the damn assignments and presentations so that i can focus on studies. Yea.. I forget how to study hard.. How to achieve excellent results.. Does it important anyway? Who cares? As long as i can finish this one-and-a-half-year foundation course ( what for with the extra-half-year) i should be contended.

Holiday

wohoooooo!!!!!! Yeeeha!!!!!!!!

Finally I was in kuching! Wow it was a long journey.. the flight delay a bit because it was raining.. And so many people went to kuching tat day.. I was unable to sit with my friend so I felt a little bit insecure.. hehe.. why the air asia doesnt allow us to sit at Fixed position? sigh.. Anyway, one week holiday is transient. it passes in a wink of an eye.. I don wan to do anything and let it passes like tat.. One of my friend with special characteristic said time is used to be wasted.. Wow.. speechless.. isnt it true? we oways let time passes and we become old day by day.. we dont know how long can we stay alive..

Hey, "touch wood". why say this kind of thing now? =_= it is not like me.. I am forced to swith off my idleness anyway.. I mst try to do some assignments this holiday for the sake of easiness of life in the future.. so i end this post with this..

IDLENESS, PLEASE $WITH OFF!!!!!!!!!!!

My God

This post is especially for my God. Thank you for helping me found my N70 memory card. HAHAHA..

And please bless my mother will stay healthy forever and overcome the obstacles.

And my one and only brother.. Wish you can finish the course smoothly and find a good job.. And also a nice girl lah.. hahaha..

I knw i am greedy.. BUt if my family can stay happiness, i can endure all the hardship of life.. I no need always woory about them.. I think i can endure the study life at gaya there.. No matter how hard is it.. Life isnt easy.. 不容易啊。。。 lol..

My simple request is my family can be always healthy and happy.. MAMA and DIDI.. I love you. Muacks.

Ameliorate or downgrade

Recently, I was forgetful.. I had lost my N70 memory card which contained my precious memory. Heart-broken. God bless me I can find it soon pls.. I swear I will take care of it.

Next, I am idle and work-shy. I just dont have the motivation to work. Maybe it is because the holiday is impending.. Or I'm missing my family. Or you are not my lecturer anymore.. Anyway, I will drag my body to continue the work. Sigh.. 

I should ameliorate myself.. But, when can I achieve my dream? I still have a long way to go. Do I still alive before attain the dream? Seeing my friends move forward day by day, yet I am standing at the starting point.. Or maybe I'm moving backward.. I am akin a kampung girl.

I'm emo now. Time to log out. Night..

Happy Birthday

Today is Beatrice and Kee Hee birthday.. As a friend, I can only wish you two happy birthday.. Wish our friendship is eternity although we are far away from each other. ALL THE BEST TO MY FRIENDS!

最近怎么了。。。

如果你认为友情不值得你为它牺牲，那么你不懂得珍惜。

p.s: LAU WUI XIN'S POST.. SINCE BABE U WANT POST, I LET U POST BA.. SEE I SO SO BENIGN ^^

Solitude

Laugh, and the world laughs with you;
Weep, and you weep alone.
For the sad old earth must borrow its mirth,
But has trouble enough of its own.
Sing, and the hills will answer;
Sigh, it is lost on the air.
The echoes bound to a joyful sound,
But shrink from voicing care.

Rejoice, and men will seek you;
Grieve, and they turn and go.
They want full measure of all your pleasure,
But they do not need your woe.
Be glad, and your friends are many;
Be sad, and you lose them all.
There are none to decline your nectared wine,
But alone you must drink life's gall.

Feast, and your halls are crowded;
Fast, and the world goes by.
Succeed and give, and it helps you live,
But no man can help you die.
There is room in the halls of pleasure
For a long and lordly train,
But one by one we must all file on
Through the narrow aisles of pain.

Fire and Ice

Some say the world will end in fire,

Some say in ice.

From what I've tasted of desire

I hold with those who favor fire.

But if it had to perish twice,

I think I know enough of hate

To say that for destruction ice

Is also great

And would suffice.

Robert Frost

The rain

The first time you looked at me,

The first time we talked,

The first time I knew that I like you,

was because of the rain..

Thanks to the rain and the memories

Yet I will go on my life without you

Deep in my heart

I realised that

It was the beginning and also the end..

After the transient rain was stop..

Insane

This is my dearest bm project which has made me suffer for so long.. I have passed up.. I tot i wouldl never see it again.. But Wat-The-Hell why it appeared again on my bed?????????? it was bcoz this poor thing was rejected by the BITCH LECTURER.. She returned the project to whole class today..

She wanted us to use COLOUR to highlight the word, added FRAME to the mind map, bibliography must have 10, and bind the project by RING.. Bla bla bla... Hello??? not everyone rich like you ok? My project has almost 80 pages and you wan me to print again? after giving us the lecture that you think was brilliant then u wanted us to belanja you satay??? Dreaming la you! Bullshit!!!

So now, i need to pass up BM on monday, PJ on tuesday, ENGLISH on wednesday.. Oh, I almost forgot.. And also the multitudinous Maths exercises on Monday which got marks.. Luckily I almost finished them. Or else I really will kill myself.. If i was in US, i will use gun to kill YOU!!!!!!!

I wan my bed

Restless life is killing me!!!!!!!!

Every morning i go to canteen and order nescafe tarik peng.. I need nescafe to keep me awake during the class.. But the actual reason is i am addicted to it!!! XD I dont know my stomach can stand for how long.. I heard tat drinking coffee in the early morning without breakfast will harm the stomach.. Well, how can i care the health when i have insufficient sleep almost everyday.. So drinking coffee is just fine.. Heheheeh..

I have the time to write blog now because i am scanning PJ book for assignment.. I really dont have the patient to stare at the book and wait.. Hence i use my leg to "tekan" de book on the printer and my hands are typing..

The onion head.. I believe most of my friends are jealous with him.. Everyone lead a hectic life now.. We seldom have a good night sleep without worrying.. I'm worn-out now.. Time to sign out and GOOD NIGHT & SLEEP TIGHT to my friend!!!!!!

属于

我坚持的都值得坚持吗

我所相信的就是真的吗

如果我敢追求我就敢拥有吗
而如果都算了不要呢
或许吧或许我永远都不会遇见他
或许吧或许我太天真了吧
属于我的昨天之前的结局
我决定我的决定
属于我的明天之后的憧憬
我迷信我的迷信
属于我们点点滴滴的伤心
我们要各自忘记
属于我们闪闪发亮的爱情
我们再一起努力
属于风的那就去飞翔吧
属于海洋的那就汹涌吧
属于我们的爱该来的就来吧
为什么不敢呢不要呢?
是他吧命中早就注定了的那个他
是他吧他原来就在这里啊
属于我的昨天之前的结局
我决定我的决定
属于我的明天之后的憧憬
我迷信我的迷信
属于我们点点滴滴的伤心
我们要各自忘记
属于我们闪闪发亮的爱情
我们再一起努力
属于我的昨天之前的结局
我决定我的决定
属于我的明天之后的憧憬
我迷信我的迷信
属于我们点点滴滴的伤心
我们要各自忘记
属于我们闪闪发亮的爱情
我们再一起努力
属于我们点点滴滴的伤心
我们要各自忘记
属于我们闪闪发亮的爱情
我们还要努力

Oh My Gosh!!!!!

Oh.

MY.

FREAKING

GOSH.

can i summit the assignments on time? Why the lecturer so fussy? No matter how we do the assignments, we still cant meet her demand? Why u always deny us? Do u know we still have other work need to do? I know u will never fathom us. You are selfish and mean...

Time is ticking away.. Lack of sleep and rest is killing me.. I am exhausted, frustrated, and on the verge of collapsing..

The day

Tomorrow is the day.. Finally the day has come..

I have prepared this for so long..

I can only now pray to God that He can bless us, so that every things go well..

Pesta Angpau 2009!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Room 2009

People say friendship is like a circle,

It goes round without end.

People say friendship is like wine,

It tastes good with ages.

People say friendship is like sunshine,

It brightens your life,

For me,

Friendship is like room 2009,

Transient happiness yet eternity..

My religion

This is my simple religion.

There is no need for temples;

no need for complicated philosophy.

Our own brain, our own heart is our temple;

the philosophy of kindness.

THE 14TH DALAI LAMA

Diabolo

I have ambivalent feeling towards diabolo.. You will love it and cherish it when you learn new skills.. But you will feel frustrated and hopeless when you are in the process of learning new skills.. When you look at de diabolo tricks tutorial video, you think that you can do it too.. But it is easier said then done.. But at least now I can do the Eight Basic Skills.. God bless me can complete the advanced skills soon.. I am dying for learning them!!!

My friends and I will do the diabolo performance at the pesta Angpau on 7th Feb.. I cant imagine the situation that day... >.<>

A New Beginning- Reborn

The rain is pouring heavily

Wash away the past fervently

Purify the Mother Earth

It's a brand New Year

a brand new day

&

my 20th birthday

I'll reborn

to become a better man..

I'll find my way..

d