What hurts the most?

What hurts the most for you now? I believe your heart will feel like being torn apart when your loves one are hurt by a monster. The saddest thing is you are unable to protect your love one. You are POWERLESS.

Once again, the monster beat my mum. I wondered why your hand did not feel pain when you hit somebody. Why are you always so childish and cannot control your emotion at all. What heinous crime has been committed by others that you totally cannot forgive them. Yae, I should know that monster only has the feeling of anger and hatred. "Monster” is the designation for belligerent human. You are akin a catastrophe to us. We have endured the torment for so many years. U knew why I insisted to study outside? It was because I wanted to be independent.. And the utmost important reason was I wanted to stay away from U. Actually I could choose Curtin to study but I didnt. Who would forcast that you transferred to Kuching work?? If like that I will stay in Miri with mother now.. Well, I know life is which unexpected events always happen. I will let bygone be bygone and look forward.

I know that in the deep of my heart, I feel a little bit fortunate because I dont need to face melancholy now. My brother is the one who always carries the burden. He has become more mature and protective. Luckily he protected my mother that day. Or else, I could not think what would happen. He must be underwent excruciating pain when the monster said," you think you can protect your mother even if you are here???" I, as the bystander, feel like there is a knife piercing through my heart when I remember his word. How bout my brother? How did he feel when he heard the word?

Anyway, thank you dd for giving unconditional love and support to mum. You are the pillar for me and mother. YOU ARE MAN!!! I love you..

I hope that the monster can exercise the forbearance in treating people tho I understand that this is an unattainable wish.